As Soskas said, you are opening up. We may be a bunch of strangers on remote machines around the world, but it’s crazy how true, meaningful friendships grow here, probably because we are more honest in our writing than we are in our day to day lives.
And, you know, if I had friends who thought that a sadass ex was the only reason I had no interest in pursuing some undesirable wanker at a bar, I probably wouldn’t bother “opening up” with them either. You deserve a bit more credit than that!