‘Grandma, It’s Feeling a Little Drafty in Here’ — Confessions of a Draft-Hoarder

Please help! Does anyone have the number for DHA? (Draft-Hoarders Anonymous)

Photo by Cristobal Baeza on Unsplash

I was recently tagged in a Medium challenge by my adorable, pink-belt-in-social-media-marketing Grandma.

The challenge is to open up my drafts folder and choose a selection from which you, my dear readers, will vote for your favourite.

But, rather than feeling honoured that she named me — her doting new granddaughter — as a nominee for this task, I was a little alarmed and exclaimed the first thing that came to my mind:

“Fuck me, that’s opening a can of worms!”

Now, I just need to clarify that I don’t literally have a can of worms tucked neatly into my draft folder. That would be daft (but not draft).

Also, I don’t especially like worms and simply would not entertain collecting them in a can. A simple fact of the matter.

Except for earthworms. I like them. But I like them IN THE EARTH, not in a can.

So Grandma, just in case you took me literally at my word, you can now rest assured that no cans of worms are involved. And no, we’re not going to analyse the “Fuck me” part of my comment.